Would you trust this man to educate your kids?

Images can be pretty flawed in showing only part of the story and not the whole picture. This picture shows me with a very sinister almost Williem Dafoe like smile, yet I like to think that my eager/readiness, modest confidence and most importantly, passion stand out too. I hope that that the qualities rather than the smile stick out. I often tell the kids I work with that I am more than a shirt and tie and that I am also much more than a Teaching Assistant. I am writer, director, ideas guy, blue-sky thinker without limits…well sort of.

That’s so far has been what the Future Producers project has made me think about and prioritize my ambitions so far. Like the image I’m not a whole picture in the sense, that passion might be clear, but how I channel it…I’m still working on.

But, after the introductory weekend, I can’t help but think that out of the four potential festivals I could be involved with…there’s a variety of roles I could do and hopefully do well because I can be passionate about what I will do. I can see myself as a workshop facilitator, project director, producer and/or creative director working across the festivals…well within two in particular. First, the ‘Encounter’s Film Festival’ because the films we’ve picked deal with issues, themes and an audience who I identify with. Secondly, ‘Gothic: The Dark Heart of Film’ because of the idea that came into my head on Saturday that got me thinking about marketing, publicity and attracting a wider audience.

Let’s start with the former. Angry teenagers. Even the good ones are pissed about something. Correction- about lots of things. Body image, being part of the crowd, parents, the world, friends, losing childhood innocence, wanting to be grown up, being an individual, being a rebel, conforming to social norms, identity, with self-esteem is tied into all these. The shorts are stories they can know, whether or not they’ve ever had an eating disorder or lost their love of fantasy. They can relate to the ideas and the way they are told and in a world where expression via social media is also influenced by social pressures. Film is another mediums for story-telling can be a way to survive and better understand the world and oneself. Part of me is still a teenager and says this is ‘our world’…whereas the adult says it’s ‘their world’.

Another way to get it out of their system, whether through directing, writing or producing, like any art form. It would tick boxes in terms of teacher training and allow me to adapt my skills towards filmmaking. Yet like the image above, it’s one that I’m comfortable with and associated with on a regular basis.

Differently, I am also an ideas person who’s overseen productions and while I have not really been a producer, I’ve helped/helping to produce a lot of theatre shows, an anthology and book trailers. In terms of the ‘Gothic’, what stuck out in my head from Saturday’s discussion was another participant had a great idea about doing a movie monster style prosthetic workshop and the name George Romero cropped up. Someone famous for zombie horror films and not Gothic films.

This got me thinking about the blurred sometimes not to clear boundaries between the two genres and the lack of knowledge of what Gothic was and still is, especially in relation to horror. And then the concept came to me. ‘Gothic vs. Horror: Frankenstein vs. Zombies‘. Whether as the festival’s theme or a strand to label some of the event that could attract a wider audience from the horror movie and big zombie-lover culture of Bristol. In my three minute long presentation on Sunday I barely scrapped the barrel with my ideas of doing a horror film vs gothic American-style film movie marathon, a Vampire walk to oppose or run alongside the famous Bristol Zombie Walk, workshops and Q and A’s with filmmakers and artists on the two genres, interactive style theatre events…etc. 

Big ideas but as I’ve learned as a light technician; it’s always better to scale down rather than up because you can still create the same effect you want to have on your audience rather than save money. Big ideas that could use someone to oversee and direct and monitoring them which I have had experience in before. And as my peers during my peers during our presentation workshop on Sunday found out, it’s something I am passionate about and engage others on. Yet the image it sort of would create while would show my management and creative skills, would not represent all the other sides I have.

Then again images are just snapshots of points in time. Then again…I am greedy…We’ll see…I’m still young!